I need to say something, and I’ve been holding this in for a long time.
Honestly… longer than I should have.
This has been eating at me because every single day I felt like I was living a lie. I smiled, I laughed, I acted like everything was normal, but deep down there was this constant fear — fear of being judged, fear of losing people, fear that the ones I love would see me differently.
So I hid.
I hid because I was scared.
Scared that if I told the truth, I’d be looked at differently… talked about… maybe even disowned by the group chat.
And I know some of you may be hurt that I didn’t tell you sooner.
I’m sorry.
I’m sorry for every time I dodged the question.
I’m sorry for every awkward laugh, every suspiciously vague answer, every “haha maybe one day” when people asked me what my type was.
The truth is… I wanted to tell you.
So many times I wanted to just scream it and be free, but every time the words got stuck in my throat because I didn’t know if I was ready for the consequences.
But I can’t keep pretending anymore.
I can’t keep living for other people’s expectations.
I deserve to be honest.
You deserve honesty.
So today, right now, I’m choosing to live as my authentic self.
No more hiding.
No more fear.
No more secret double life.
I am…
straight.
Yes.
Heterosexual.
A member of the aggressively mainstream.
I like the opposite gender.
There, I said it.
I know this may come as a shock to some of you. Some of you probably suspected. Some of you are currently processing. Some of you may need space.
And that’s okay.
All I ask is that you love me for who I am.
Because underneath it all… I’m still me.
Just… painfully straight.
Thank you.