I've come down with a cold today, and coupled with the work I'm doing for Royale I've been a bit slow to respond to Admin tickets and such. I'm trying to heal quickly so I can get back on my A Game 💕

To be honest, I didn't want to write a blog like this. After rejecting about 3 or so attempts by Mezcal to patch this up, I was fully content to move on and take the steps toward breaking my chains of attachment. Of course, Mezcal's massive ego can't handle rejection and he decided to blow this up into a full defamation campaign. So, here's my story: Most of you know I came to this site about two months ago during winter holidays. Like many of the other queer and neurodivergent people here - looking for a safe space from the real world that can often be so isolating toward us. I'm so grateful that I've been able to meet and share my heart with many genuine people who are like me in that regard. Unfortunately, I was also lured and manipulated into feeling a home with someone who was never looking to provide one. I'll be the first to admit that I have issues with insecurity and attachment - including 'daddy issues' and a broken home, as many queer people have experienced. I don't think Mezcal is ignorant to this at all; I feel he weaponizes it to fuel his ego and roleplay like the father a bunch of us have never had. You'll continuously see him refer to himself as daddy; he can say it's ironic all he'd like but it's creepy as fuck. He calls The OC not friends, but a family and himself as the head of the table. I have no doubt in his claims that this is all a mask, but what IS real is the manipulative and trauma bonding effect this can have on vulnerable people and I am an example of that. So why did me and Mezcal develop this sort of toxic relationship? Well, it takes two to tango. Mezcal would continually call himself daddy and encourage me to do the same, say that he loves me and treated me as though we had a special bond. A fantasy I was sadly too happy to play into. He got kicks knowing I would be submissive, telling others that he could "control me" in games and that I'd do as he'd say. I knew I was a better player than him of course, so carrying him to some f2s was easy enough. It was fun, and I felt like I'd found home. But this kind of home is temporary and an illusion; you can never keep the full affection of someone who's only treating you as a toy for their amusement. Eventually, he grew cold, and stopped responding to my mails. While he put me at second on his friend list on return, he deleted me for evicting him in a hysteria not long after when we had no f2. He guilt tripped the hell out of me, saying he "only plays for us" and "thought I knew that we had unconditional loyalty" and forced me to make a genuine apology and unbreakable loyalty agreement. I fell right back in line, believing that we truly had an unbreakable bond special to us. When mandatory elections took place in The OC, I wanted to use it as an opportunity to show that I loved and cared. He never went back to treating me the same after I evicted him in Hysteria, even refusing to put me back on his friend list, so I thought I could earn back his affection. I ran and secured the presidency and made sure Mezcal was aware that I only wanted to help make The OC the best klique on Kovaze because it had been collecting dust. I immediately laid out plans to revitalize the klique but was only met with cold silence from Mezcal. The only comment he would make was a blog declaring that "The OC is dead." Then we played two frenzies together where I played my usual role as loyal soldier before being betrayed and voted out by Mezcal in both games for "disrespecting him" as "head of the table." Obviously I was hurt, so I left The OC. Over the next few days, I sent messages to Mezcal explaining my feelings and how icing me out was effecting me when he was once so warm. All unanswered. I sent a message explaining that being ignored like this was not okay, before sending him my last mail the next day telling him our friendship was over and to not contact me again, blocking him and believing it would be the end of it. He then remade his discord to finally send me the apology I wanted to hear. I was skeptical, so I pushed back as anyone should. This lead him to saying this was all a manifestation of my mental illness and insecurities, and that basically I just need to get over it so we can start dominating frenzies again. That was obviously not okay with me, so I made it clear that while my insecurities absolutely played a role - I expect better from people who say that they love me. After about two more attempts to get me to drop it, he decided to turn it into this public spectacle. If Mezcal was so uncomfortable by my attachment and "love-bombing" as he said, why would he continuously feed into the role? Why would he wait until I've had enough of the push and pull of his manipulation and ended our friendship to claim that my behavior was so horrible? Yes, I fell for a married man and that makes me an idiot. And yes I projected some of my attachment issues onto him when he made me feel safe to do so. The people who have taken the time to know me on here understand that I am a genuine and passionate person with a big heart that's eager to share it with the people I love. And when you're one of those people, trust me you will know. Can that be overwhelming sometimes? Sure. I'll accept being called a weirdo for that, but what I won't accept is his claim that he did not play into this dynamic every step of the way. I don't believe that Mezcal is some horrible person. I don't doubt that overtime this became uncomfortable for him. Like I said, it takes two to tango and we both clearly have some issues to work on, as many of us do. I do think that he likes the attention he gets from queer people on here. When on one hand you are claiming to be this married 9-5 wife guy and on the other trying to play out some father fantasy to queer people - the lines can get blurred. I think your behavior on here is inappropriate. If I was your wife, I would not be understanding of the amount of times I've seen you sexualize other women, the way you talk about fucking your wife, or the kind of dynamic we shared. But that's not my business. Mezcal - I'm sorry for projecting on you and developing insecure attachment. I hope we can both learn and grow from this experience. I think that putting me on public blast like this was immature and messed up. Thank you.

Im ALL for playing your own game, doing what you gotta do to win. Im always down to play ball. And if I get fucked over yeah I may be salty but once I get my lick back I’m good. But this Outcasted SENT MEEEEEE, like I’m not even mad at anyone at all cause I didn’t invest much into it. But MissChloeKay …. Gurllll. You were like at the top of my list cause we been wanting to be tribe mates!!!!! Girl Stephanie votes me out and I go home, I had no idea I was the vote cause I went to bed early. But how do you slay my ass when I’m sleeping then go home next 😭😭😭😭 Moral of the story. If you fuck Harajuku over, then go home next. Expect a video like this.

Todays theme: People i immediately want on my team when i see them in Race! Ill definitely forget people cuz theres a lot of good racers and people i have fun with but heres those i can think of off the top of my head! Suicide #TeamSpriticide PosterBoy #TeamSpriteBoy Envious #TeamEnvite Medusaluh #TeamSpritealuh DakotaMagic #TeamSpriteMagic Connor #TeamConnite Onyx #TeamSpyrx AngieKStan #TeamSpriteKStan Runaways #TeamSpriteaways Style #TeamSpryle Matcha #TeamBeverages IceBeast #TeamIceSprite Bagel #TeamBagelSprite Papa #TeamPapite THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER

I’m fucking sick to my stomach. This is the harshest celebrity death for me.

for those of you who are waiting for my new blox game to drop i fell asleep after my body couldnt take me being awake any longer (my girl sin gets it), im just putting the final details on the game as we speak and then it'll be out by this morning

NOOOO PLS where’s that asteroid just hit us already

Thank you to all my loving friends for the support and to my addiction to race! Jadennator1 Mittens Joeburrow Icebeast PureEssence _Jan Jaded Melodrama Nuke Jessiejedi Christos Hwest14 Tisha Envious Katheryn Melanie Bomberv Luxray NaughtyNacho and many more <3

I was at a Pickleball tournament, and I was like let me check Grindr and see if there are any hot pickleball players around. There was not, there never is, most pickleball players are ugly, minus me, because I'm not ugly. Trust me. However, I WAS SHOCKED WHEN I SAW MY BEST FRIENDS HUSBAND..........................ON GRINDR, I WAS SO FUCKING SHELL SHOCKED, and I was watching his MATCH and the GRINDR profile was LIKE 0 FEET AWAY FROM ME, AND MATCHED HIS NAME, I WAS LIKE OMG, so I screenshotted, and then I had to go play my match, and like I did not feel like it was appropriate to be like ruin their marriage at a Pickleball Tournament, like they were there with their kids. However, like of course I am going to tell her, like your husband is a you know what, you know, and is cheating on you, and girl he is kinda ugly, so like you can't put up with this. Like if you are going to cheat you need to be hot at least, how you going to be ugly AND UNFAITHFUL. HOWEVER, it turns out she KNEW all along, because he is BISEXUAL, and sometimes has sex with guys, and she is fine with that, and they have a happy marriage, and I can't judge I'm single writing a blog on Kovaze. They slay though lowkey, me and her got cheesecake and mimosas the other day. IDK why I felt like sharing this story, and if you read, big hugs stay safe

our men only alliance succeeded. well done lads By Lewis, 3 minutes ago

Everyone has been making Royale blogs, and while I have thoughts on that game, I feel like enough has been said. Instead, I thought I'd make one on Outcasted with some of the things I liked, some of the things I didn't, and potential changes that could be made. 1. Firstly, I think that hunting and collecting water is a great idea that has been given hate for no reason. There needs to be a way to differentiate active players who are helping the tribe from those who aren't and are just good at comps. BUT, food levels have WAY too much of an impact on competition scores. It is essentially impossible to beat someone who has a 15% less penalty than you in half of the comps on the site if they are even okay at comps, which shouldn't be the case. I think the penalties should ease up or food should drop at a lesser rate to help combat this. Also, as a side note, comp scores should NOT break ties. Having it algo is a better method than having comps be the tiebreaker. 2. On top of this, I think the new system is quite.... convoluted. Just have a hunt equal 10 food for the tribe at the cost of 5 water (or whatever numbers that make it balanced) and call it a day, I think having only a % chance at getting food just makes it too random. On top of that, have food go down at a rate of x per hour, not this decimal stuff. People on this site already can't count shapes in a box, how do you expect them to do this math? Speaking of math, show the RAW scores for comps in brackets after the post-penalty scores. I don't want people thinking I got 2k in flags... 3. This one might just be me, but I honestly really miss the idea of "kpelling". Sure, it wasn't an intended consequence of being med evac'd on the tengaged version of survivor, but it literally changed the meta of the game and made it way more interesting. That being said, I think falling to 0 food and 0 water is reason enough to be med evac'd and this should be added to the game. Also, some way of your health decreasing (ex. eating without fire on the tengaged version) would be helpful. 4. Another gripe I have is idols. There are just way too many squares to try and find an idol, especially when you also need to use your resources to hunt for food. I like the idea of having that trade-off, but maybe there should be fewer squares for the idol to be hidden in? And it should be the same square on everyone's board so that groups can "hunt down" an idol if they want to. To illustrate the first point, NONE of the 3 idols were found in our game, which made tribals less pivotal. On this point, other advantages could also be added. Extra vote, nullification, etc. or even food rewards for the tribe or individual. This would make the game feel more real. 5. Also, adding redemption island for some games would be fun! Like maybe 1 in every 5 games or something? 6. Overall, I thought the game was solid. Our tribe having 40 degree weather for 75% of the game wasn't fun, but I expect that won't be the case in most games. The Tengaged version of survivor was my favourite game, and while this game is very different, it scratched some of that itch. It's much more like the real survivor for sure, which is great! But I have to say, I do miss having a merge streak with a mix of my friends and people I'm just meeting. I think a version of survivor where there is merge streaks would be an excellent addition! And it would only take some minor tweaks. Also Envious's blog (https://www.kovaze.com/blog/62271) is a fantastic idea that incorporates "merge streaks" in a different way. I think having either that or a merge streak version of survivor (or both!) would be an amazing addition! Ik this is the bible but I hope you read this and take some of it into consideration sin, I think most people will agree with most of these points.

Ordered Panera

the start of these long ass blogs, like lets put that middle school education into use guys i love to hear peoples thoughts in depth. i dont wanna just see that someone in frenzy is fake, tell me how from start to finish

when trying to open the minigame hof

being a top 10 album of all time but tory lanez being a top 10 worst person of all time is fucked up #teammeg

i’d like to fight with someone publicly and i’d like them to say something out of line that would get the blogs page to be nice to me tonight and tomorrow. any takers willing to take one for the team in the name of Sprite getting to be a victim? let me know.