My Kovaze family
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My Kovaze family
Dear Kovaze Family,
I just wanted to take a moment to appreciate the wonderful people who make this family so special... and by special, I mean completely chaotic.
Connor, my grandpa, thank you for reminding me every single day that age is just a number when you're busy destroying me in Arena and Race.
Jaded, my little brother, world champion of blaming race partners. Somehow every loss is everyone else's fault, yet every win mysteriously belongs to him.
MaxOra, my mother, thank you for remembering I exist every 10 months. Seeing your messages is like spotting a rare legendary event.
Chris, my boyfriend, my biggest supporter and partner in crime since Celebs. We've been connected for so long that Kovaze should probably charge us rent.
Lewis, my dog. I spend more time rescuing you in Arena than actually playing the game. If there was an award for being carried, you'd have ten of them.
Dimitra, my sister, who somehow always looks better dressed than me and keeps buying clothes like she's personally funding the fashion industry.
itsamodernlife, my older brother and the role model of the family. The rest of us make mistakes so he can continue looking perfect.
Guib, my second dog. If barking was an Olympic sport, you'd have more gold medals than the entire family combined.
Gabs, my stepmother, thank you for the occasional clothes, the company, and for tolerating this circus we call a family.
HarryP and Goomybear, my gay friends. The most inseparable duo in Kovaze history. If one appears, the other is never more than three seconds away. Honestly, you two have spent so much time together that people are starting to wonder if you're sharing the same account.
AmandaSings04, my aunt and the undisputed Blog Queen of Kovaze. If there’s gossip, drama, fashion news, or a random potato sighting, Amanda has already written three articles about it.
Tisha, my daughter. She was born via C-section and already making dramatic entrances into the family lore. The only mystery bigger than her DNTM activity schedule is… who her father is, because honestly, nobody knows and we’ve all stopped asking.
Lasty, AngieKstan and Lolicapolica, my cousins. Somehow they're always dressed like they're walking a red carpet while I'm dressed like I lost a bet. We always end up meeting in Arena, and every time we play together it's all good vibes, good chats, and me pretending I wasn't just getting destroyed five minutes earlier.
Love you all. Even the ones who keep beating me, ignoring me, barking at me, dressing better than me, or blaming everyone else for their losses.
Your favourite family member,
(Probably)
KaliMinaj
19 votes, 246 points

Comments
KKKKKKKKKK CADELA
HELPPPPP AT MINE ?? OMG no u are truly my mother. u birthed me on kovaze kaliminaj legit my first ever friend and ally. i could never forget my minaj.
Tisha That’s so true let me re-write yours.
ILYYYY
Cousins ❤️
AngieKStan us put together as we should causr we love KousinKali
lolicapolica Kousin is a new word i love it
chosen family <3 ... now where the fuck is Goomy?
HarryP He’s right behind you stop lying
KaliMinaj He is me
mom
KaliMinaj 😂😂 ily soooo much 🫂🫂🫶🏼
I love you so much <3